Total Recall (2012) – 1 Out of 5 Graves
This movie has the dishonorable distinction of being the first 1 Out of 5 I’ve given. I write this in a cold rage, angry that I wasted time watching this movie. The original was so much better, even if the special effects have shown through with the years.
Reasons 2012 Version Sucked:
- The dialogue and the action were so fast it was hard to follow.
- The action is so twitchy and fast it was impossible to enjoy.
- They fought so hard to make this one different than the first version that they just screwed it up. The part with the tear versus the drop of sweat really bothered me between the two versions.
- What the hell was with the giant tunnel through the earth? Oh yeah, another example of how they screwed it up compared to the original. People commute every day up and down that?
- There were too many scenes with Kate Beckinsale that looked like they were taken right out her vampire movies. The way she runs and jumps and lands in a crouch. I love those movies, but her action scenes gave me flashbacks to the Underworld movies.
- The tattoo on his wrist at the end. This was the absolute worst. I hate the “trick” endings
In summary I don’t think the remake was well thought out or well executed. Which is a shame. There were so many great actors in it.